When you hear the word forgiveness what is the first thing that comes to mind? Do you immediately envision a scenario where two people have quarreled and one comes to the other with a down –trodden look and says, “I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?” Maybe you think about forgiveness as a way to pacify or keep things peaceful. Then again, maybe you see forgiveness as a weakness, a character flaw, an undesirable, unnecessary part of life.
If you have lived for any length of time, long enough that you can read this, then you have been wronged at least once in your life but probably multiple times. The sting of betrayal, ridicule, rejection, abuse, lies and ill-treatment bring memories that are vivid and often very hard to forget. The truth is it just plain hurts. It hurts to be sinned against. Sin hurts. And because sin hurts, forgiveness is hard. The ultimate price of forgiveness was death, so, yes, forgiveness is hard ….and it is costly. Jesus knows. But, if you have been a believer any time at all you know that just because something is hard doesn’t mean we can ignore it. On the contrary, we are, more often than not, called to do the hard thing. The thing that goes against our natural, fleshly inclinations and requires strength that only the Spirit of God can equip us to fulfill. Forgiveness is one of those things.
Forgiveness is a topic rarely talked about anymore. We certainly don’t hear about it in secular circles and we hear about it less and less in Christian circles. Why? Because forgiveness is passé. Retaliation, revenge, playing hard ball, making someone pay, making excuses, back peddling and getting even are all characteristics of strong, successful people. Justifying our bitterness, anger and unforgiveness is widely accepted today. We say things like, “I don’t blame you, I’d be mad too” or “don’t get mad, get even” or “pay day, some day.” Qualities like forgiveness, forbearance and reconciliation are not valued, if anything they are seen as weakness. In our minds, we associate forgiveness with spineless doormats who just need to learn to stand up for themselves.
However, this is not what scripture teaches. So, either we are wrong or scripture is wrong. Time and again the world and scripture are going to collide. We will constantly be making decisions to follow the world or follow the Lord. Scripture says in Romans 12:2, “Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind!”
So, in this study we are going to lay aside our conformity to the world on forgiveness and be transformed by what the Word says! We will examine what scripture says about forgiveness in 5 areas: the Basis of our forgiveness, the Bitterness of withholding forgiveness, the Basics of forgiveness, the Blessing of forgiveness and the Benefit of forgiveness. We will biblically navigate all of these aspects of forgiveness. Why should we forgive? What does it look like to forgive? Does forgiving mean I should forget? What if the person who hurt me never asks for forgiveness?
Between today and tomorrow take some time to search your heart and petition the Lord in prayer. Make a list of people that you have not forgiven. Yes, maybe you said you had forgiven them but deep down you know you are still penalizing them and harboring bitterness towards them. Ask the Lord to grant you grace during this study to lay this down once and for all to His glory…and for your good.
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