I would definitely say we have had our share of thunderstorms this summer. It seems that every day for the last week or so about 4 or 5 o’clock in the afternoon that there is a dull rumble of thunder in the distance followed ever so quickly by a torrential downpour – or what people in the south like to call a “gulley washer”. This is southern slang for one of those storms that comes out of nowhere, pours buckets for about 15 or 20 minutes to the extent that the ground can’t absorb the overflow and so the gullies flood. If you have ever been caught in one driving down the road or woken up to its fury in the middle of the night, it can seem like the longest 15 or 20 minutes of your life!
I often like to read the lyrics of old hymns because there is such awesome theology in them; theology that speaks of people who knew the Lord in a way that seems almost foreign to us now. One such hymn is William Cowper’s “God Moves in Mysterious Ways”. I was particularly drawn in by these verses:
God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea
And rides upon the storm.
Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take;
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
In blessings on your head.
His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flow’r.
Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.
These words not only made me think of the unpredictable nature of thunderstorms but also the unpredictable nature of God. The paranoid side of me, when I see dark clouds forming and a storm ahead, automatically thinks the worst, plans for the worst and inevitably waits for the worst . I’ll be honest. The unpredictable nature of God is not always comforting to me either. Well, if I am being honest, most of the time it isn’t comforting to me. I am a planner, a control-freak, type A etc; I want to know the end from the beginning. I want to know all of the why’s, when’s and how’s to every situation. I don’t like the angst and anxiety of not knowing what tomorrow will hold or how to prepare for it. I want to know when the storm will be over!! It is unsettling to say the least! But recently, the Lord has really started to test me in this area and to convict me as well because…well, because it is sin. Sin that I do not trust Him for what I cannot see. Sin that as the bible says, “without faith it is impossible to please God.” Not somewhat possible, not maybe possible but IMPOSSIBLE to please God (Hebrews 11:6).
I ask myself “why is it that you are convinced that God is only able to work in good and happy times?” What brings Him greater glory: An impossible, stormy, cloud-covered situation or a bright, clear, happy circumstance? I know which brings ME greater glory and joy. But isn’t that the point when God says “I will not give my glory to another” – even you, even me (Is. 42:8)? In the sunshine it is so easy for us to give credit to ourselves or to not even think about giving anyone credit, we just move along from day to day while things are good. However, when the storm hits, the thunder shakes the foundation and the lightning threatens to strike, where is our focus?
Sometimes we ask a lot of “why’s” from God and we fail to realize that explanation rarely changes things. Revelation changes things. We get so hung up on an explanation that we cannot see that what we need is revelation. We need more of Him to get us through the storm, not a ten point dissertation on why we are in the middle of the storm. In the middle of the night when the storm rages I don’t want a stranger to hold onto, I want my husband! I know him, I feel safe with him, I trust him. So it is with God. When we know Him, we find security in His presence and we focus on His presence not on the storm.
Consider and meditate on these things: Would Peter’s faith have ever been strengthened by walking on water if there hadn’t been a storm? Would the disciples have seen Jesus for who He truly was if there had been no crisis for Him to perform a miracle over? If men were not lame, demon-possessed, blind or dead would Jesus have been worshipped for the power He embodied as God in the flesh?
I am guilty of thinking that every unfavorable circumstance in my life is a result of God’s displeasure with me. I rationalize that in some way I am being disciplined because life is hard. Sometimes this is the case. Sometimes we face consequences to our sin but there are times when we are simply vessels for which His glory might be revealed. In John 9:2-3, right before Jesus was to heal a blind man his disciples asked, “Who sinned, this man or his parents that he would be born blind? But Jesus answered and said, “It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” This man, blind from birth, was a vessel to reveal God’s glory. Do you think being blind had been a burden to him? Do you think that the thought that he was blind due to some unpardonable sin had been a heavy weight to bear? Absolutely! But all of this “that the works of God might be displayed in him!”
The Lord has promised us in His word that “all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose” (Romans 8:28). We can bank on the fact that we WILL get the good in Christ Jesus but HE chooses how He gets the glory. We don’t get to choose how He gets His glory. We don’t get to choose what cross we will bear. This is what scripture talks about in denying self, taking up your cross and following Him. Putting aside our ideas of how things should be, what we want to be or how we would like things to go and allowing God to simply USE us for His good pleasure. We can choose to allow ourselves to willingly lay down our lives as vessels to His glory every day. You see, ultimately, everyone will be a vessel for God’s glory whether through wrath or through grace but ALL mankind WILL give Him glory. “What if God, wanting to show His wrath and to make His power known, endured with much longsuffering the vessels of wrath prepared for destruction, and that He might make known the riches of His glory on the vessels of mercy, which He had prepared beforehand for glory” (Romans 9:22-23)? What a gracious gift to be marked out for honor rather than for wrath! This very fact should make our hearts sing with delight and our “yokes easy and our burdens light.” What grace to be used for the glory of God even when all we can see is the storm!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Love and Marriage, Love and Marriage...
It truly has been too long! Summer is here and she is hot and busy as usual! Sometimes writing is like anything else - when you don’t use it, you lose it. I almost feel as if I have forgotten how to do this thing and I get overwhelmed. Summertime is notorious for a lack of creativity in my brain. I think it must be the heat that drains the life and mind out of a person. It would seem to be a reasonable explanation for why we flock to swimming pools or the nearest body of water to sit for hours and do nothing but bake in the sun!
I think I mentioned at one point, several posts ago, that we have a lot of couples getting married from our church this summer. Love is in the air! Likewise, we have just finished a marriage study at our church by John Piper entitled “This Momentary Marriage”. (As a side note, this is my very enthusiastic endorsement for this series which is a 9 part podcast downloaded for free at desiringgod.org or you can purchase the book by the same title. If you want to understand the true meaning of marriage along with the highly esteemed roles of husband and wife, run to get this book!!! Excellent, must read, etc;.) Having been a wedding and event planner for nearly six years now I have seen A LOT of weddings. And with A LOT of weddings come a lot of ideas about marriage. Unfortunately, most are getting more wrong than they are right - which is very disheartening from a believer’s point of view. It seems that there are three mistakes that are repeated over and over. I hope that this might serve to elevate your view of marriage if nothing else!
First, most couples are basing their marriage on love. Before you cast me out as a heretic of all things romantic, let me explain! Love is hardly even definable these days. Love is a “junk draw” term. You know, the kitchen junk draw that is the catch-all for inkless pens, random screws, the 80’s broken cassette tape, a dated phone book and any other useless thing that is only needed the day AFTER you throw it away! You get my drift! I love Mexican and I love my husband, but, I don’t love Kraig in the same way I love Mexican (some days it is close - notice I didn’t use shoes as the analogy, HA!). The reality is, we love everything that makes us feel good for the moment but if that person or thing ceases to make us feel good we are out! Why? Because marriage is based on the feeling of love not a covenant promise or a deliberate choice. Why? Because we don’t understand the covenant of marriage.
“Marriage is not something to be entered into lightly.” If you have attended many wedding ceremonies you may have heard the officiant make this statement. The world would say, “marriage is not to be entered into lightly because you might make the wrong choice and beg to be released.” The truth: I can promise no matter how wonderful things are there will be days when you want to be released - and he will too! But the real reason marriage is not to be entered into lightly is that it is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and the church. You have a noble challenge to uphold the glorious relationship of Jesus and His bride, the church. So, marriage is not really about love as a feeling; it is more about love as a commitment to the Lord first. Mainly because your spouse is not going to be able to be a sustaining source for your joy.
Which is precisely point number two. Your spouse will not be a sustaining source of pleasure, joy, passion, happiness and all things fulfilling in your life. I fall short on a regular basis of being to Kraig and for Kraig all that he needs. I am simply not made to sustain him or even be a foundation for his joy. (I am mostly a source of sanctification more than anything but we’ll make that another conversation entirely - when he starts writing!) My point is that when we make our spouses into a type of Messiah then we set them and ourselves up for failure. There is no person created for you to complete you. Until we know the lover of our souls in the person of Jesus Christ we will continue to put unreasonable expectations on those that we date and marry. Although this may not end in divorce, it can make for a very unhappy home and many doubts of having “chosen the wrong one.”
Lastly, we don’t wait in expectation for the consummation, literally and figuratively. This seems like a literal statement about abstinence and it is, but I want to address the figurative side for now. Consummation is the culmination or completion of something. In the Jewish culture once a man was betrothed to a woman he went away to prepare a place for them to live. Traditionally, he was building onto his parent’s home and once his task was complete he would come to receive his bride and consummate their relationship through marriage but the couple typically remained separated until that time. Keep in mind that this was way before the times of cell service, home phones, pony express or even the telegraph so there wasn’t any notice for the bride. Her role was to watch, wait and prepare from the day he left until he returned, not knowing when he would return. Hopefully sooner rather than later she would look up and see a caravan coming from far off. As they approached, she would hear shouts of “the bridegroom is coming, the bridegroom is coming” at which point she would quickly veil and ready herself for a glorious wedding celebration that would last for days! Now, you want to talk about romantic? I am smitten!
The bride never takes her eyes off of the horizon. She never looks for another bridegroom and she waits...patiently with joy and expectation. We are the eternal bride of Christ but we rarely live life in faithful, patient expectation, awaiting the arrival of our bridegroom. He has indeed gone to “prepare a place for us” and will return at a time that no one, not even the Son is knows. How would our lives and our marriages be different if we were busy about readying ourselves for the return of our Savior? Suddenly, all of the misconstrued feelings, emotional letdowns and unmet expectations pale in comparison to the eternal weight of glory that will be our future!
Marriage is wonderful, marriage is hard and marriage is glorious not because of the two people that make the union but because of the God who joins the two together. The mystery of what occurs in a wedding ceremony is not based on man but based on God, the author and designer of the marriage covenant. “What God has joined together, let no man separate” (Mark 10:9) Congratulations to all of our couples and may the God of our Lord Jesus Christ richly bless you as you seek to reflect His glory as husband and wife!
I think I mentioned at one point, several posts ago, that we have a lot of couples getting married from our church this summer. Love is in the air! Likewise, we have just finished a marriage study at our church by John Piper entitled “This Momentary Marriage”. (As a side note, this is my very enthusiastic endorsement for this series which is a 9 part podcast downloaded for free at desiringgod.org or you can purchase the book by the same title. If you want to understand the true meaning of marriage along with the highly esteemed roles of husband and wife, run to get this book!!! Excellent, must read, etc;.) Having been a wedding and event planner for nearly six years now I have seen A LOT of weddings. And with A LOT of weddings come a lot of ideas about marriage. Unfortunately, most are getting more wrong than they are right - which is very disheartening from a believer’s point of view. It seems that there are three mistakes that are repeated over and over. I hope that this might serve to elevate your view of marriage if nothing else!
First, most couples are basing their marriage on love. Before you cast me out as a heretic of all things romantic, let me explain! Love is hardly even definable these days. Love is a “junk draw” term. You know, the kitchen junk draw that is the catch-all for inkless pens, random screws, the 80’s broken cassette tape, a dated phone book and any other useless thing that is only needed the day AFTER you throw it away! You get my drift! I love Mexican and I love my husband, but, I don’t love Kraig in the same way I love Mexican (some days it is close - notice I didn’t use shoes as the analogy, HA!). The reality is, we love everything that makes us feel good for the moment but if that person or thing ceases to make us feel good we are out! Why? Because marriage is based on the feeling of love not a covenant promise or a deliberate choice. Why? Because we don’t understand the covenant of marriage.
“Marriage is not something to be entered into lightly.” If you have attended many wedding ceremonies you may have heard the officiant make this statement. The world would say, “marriage is not to be entered into lightly because you might make the wrong choice and beg to be released.” The truth: I can promise no matter how wonderful things are there will be days when you want to be released - and he will too! But the real reason marriage is not to be entered into lightly is that it is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and the church. You have a noble challenge to uphold the glorious relationship of Jesus and His bride, the church. So, marriage is not really about love as a feeling; it is more about love as a commitment to the Lord first. Mainly because your spouse is not going to be able to be a sustaining source for your joy.
Which is precisely point number two. Your spouse will not be a sustaining source of pleasure, joy, passion, happiness and all things fulfilling in your life. I fall short on a regular basis of being to Kraig and for Kraig all that he needs. I am simply not made to sustain him or even be a foundation for his joy. (I am mostly a source of sanctification more than anything but we’ll make that another conversation entirely - when he starts writing!) My point is that when we make our spouses into a type of Messiah then we set them and ourselves up for failure. There is no person created for you to complete you. Until we know the lover of our souls in the person of Jesus Christ we will continue to put unreasonable expectations on those that we date and marry. Although this may not end in divorce, it can make for a very unhappy home and many doubts of having “chosen the wrong one.”
Lastly, we don’t wait in expectation for the consummation, literally and figuratively. This seems like a literal statement about abstinence and it is, but I want to address the figurative side for now. Consummation is the culmination or completion of something. In the Jewish culture once a man was betrothed to a woman he went away to prepare a place for them to live. Traditionally, he was building onto his parent’s home and once his task was complete he would come to receive his bride and consummate their relationship through marriage but the couple typically remained separated until that time. Keep in mind that this was way before the times of cell service, home phones, pony express or even the telegraph so there wasn’t any notice for the bride. Her role was to watch, wait and prepare from the day he left until he returned, not knowing when he would return. Hopefully sooner rather than later she would look up and see a caravan coming from far off. As they approached, she would hear shouts of “the bridegroom is coming, the bridegroom is coming” at which point she would quickly veil and ready herself for a glorious wedding celebration that would last for days! Now, you want to talk about romantic? I am smitten!
The bride never takes her eyes off of the horizon. She never looks for another bridegroom and she waits...patiently with joy and expectation. We are the eternal bride of Christ but we rarely live life in faithful, patient expectation, awaiting the arrival of our bridegroom. He has indeed gone to “prepare a place for us” and will return at a time that no one, not even the Son is knows. How would our lives and our marriages be different if we were busy about readying ourselves for the return of our Savior? Suddenly, all of the misconstrued feelings, emotional letdowns and unmet expectations pale in comparison to the eternal weight of glory that will be our future!
Marriage is wonderful, marriage is hard and marriage is glorious not because of the two people that make the union but because of the God who joins the two together. The mystery of what occurs in a wedding ceremony is not based on man but based on God, the author and designer of the marriage covenant. “What God has joined together, let no man separate” (Mark 10:9) Congratulations to all of our couples and may the God of our Lord Jesus Christ richly bless you as you seek to reflect His glory as husband and wife!
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