Coconuts vs. Rotten Apples

Girls, girls, girls…can I be honest with you from one girl to another? What are we doing?? Do we even realize that we are becoming our own worst enemy? So, I am parenting a twelve year old boy who is the cutest thing ever because all mother’s think their kids are the cutest! I often joke with him and tell him that he would be my choice if I were a girl his age! He blushes and then we laugh! But I want to tell you, the girls are making me sad…that’s right, sad. Sad for him and sad for them. If you are already overly aggressive at twelve then what is the hope for you and our young men in the future?

We have an epidemic of women in their late twenties and early thirties who are checking their biological clocks and pursuing every man with a pulse who isn’t in an orange jumpsuit! Of course I am being a bit facetious but it is amazing how clear things become when you are a spectator instead of a participant. I have to say that I am concerned for our young women because they are simply perpetuating this behavior in men! When a young man cannot even walk down the hall by himself without being accompanied by girls who are clamoring for attention where does that leave him? How can his parents teach him to pursue a young woman when he doesn’t have to? How can they teach him to be the leader of his home when he hasn’t been given the chance to take the lead in starting a simple conversation?

Girls, ladies, women…we have got to turn this thing around! We have got to get back to the days of allowing men to choose or they will never choose! Why are men delaying marriage and dating women for decades until they are almost forced down the aisle?? Because they can! They don’t have to work to win a woman’s heart. They don’t have to climb the tree for the prize fruit because there is fruit all over the ground! My advice: be a coconut not a rotten apple!

A man who will lead his family will never start out taking a back seat to a woman’s lead. If he does, there will be a lot of conflict and anguish that occurs as he fights to take his rightful place in the home. Eventually, he will either get there or give up! Sadly, most men are giving up because they are tired of the power struggle. You see, this is what God placed within them from the very beginning and when we squelch that or try and reverse the roles then we are messing with divine design!

I write this as a challenge for all of the young girls who are already starting out on a wide path paved by the world. I long to see us take back our marriages, our homes and our womanhood from the enemy! Let’s begin by looking intently at the good roles that God has given us as RESPONDERS not pursuers. Let’s give men their jobs back and take a break from the responsibility that was never ours to begin with!

Now to the mothers of these girls: teach your daughters well! Teach them that their actions, words and CLOTHING should witness to what is in their hearts! Teach them to find themselves worthy of a young man who would genuinely want them. Not because they are accessible but because he worked for it! Teach them to dream of a godly husband and do the things that will attract that kind of man. Why? Because this is what is truly in our hearts. This is what all women desire but we are impatient and anxious. The curse that was placed on Eve because of her sin is perpetual: “Your desire will be for your husband.” (Genesis 3:16) That’s not sexual desire that is the desire to lead, to be the man! Is God true or is He true?? Absolutely! His word is always applicable, always true and always GOOD! Let’s teach our girls to drink deeply from the well of God’s word and find their satisfaction and fulfillment from their One and Only soul mate, Jesus Christ!

I am praying for you…